I dissolved into a HUGE steaming pile of unidentifiable biological matter. Snot was running down my face and I got the hiccups.
I need to VENT.
In order for us to be married in Italy:
-we need current birth certificates,
-which then have to be stamped with an Apostille from the Secretary of State in compliance with the Hague Convention’s international laws,
-which then has to be translated into Italian, -
which then has to be driven up to L.A. with two witnesses,
-which then has to be sealed by the Italian Consulate when our two witnesses swear that we are who we say we are, we’ve never been married before, and that we are not feloniously entering into a marriage,
-which then has to be sent ASAP to Rome by July 1st along with a SHITLOAD of other documents and applications.
JEEZALOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
First of all, I do NOT have a way of getting my currently registered birth certificate because that office in Kabul was bombed and shelled by the Soviets back in the early 1980s. Soooo, we have to get a “special” stamped document for me. Yay for me!
Second, I just found out that Ed’s state of birth has a 6 MONTHS BACKLOG on these requests!!!! You would think they would have mentioned that somewhere! You would think! We even sent everything off with plenty of time!!!
I began begging and pleading with Vivian the little old lady on the phone, then I started bargaining, and then I just gave in and started crying. You should have heard me!
Vivian finally said that she’d talk to her supervisor and get back to me. When she did, she gave me a whole new set of hoops to jump through in order to make all of this happen. The race is on for me to get all this CRAP out to them via overnight mail. Oh, and get this, they ONLY accept U.S. Post Office overnight mail, NOT Fed Ex or any other service. So this means I have to find time to haul ass to the nearest post office in the midst of client meetings and other stuff involved with actual work.
All this tops off an insane morning. After a fantastic spin class at 5:30, I rushed home where I had the pleasure of taking the first smacks at the wall with my sledgehammer. It was SO MUCH FUN. After I was scolded by the main contractor for not having safety goggles or a helmet, I decided to call it a day. Besides, it was really hard to do! Good thing the contractors are big, beefy dudes.
But, my intention to quietly go off and get ready for work was not to be. The contractors sweetly explained to us at 7:45 this morning that we had to get everything moved out of the general living and dining area because of the beams they’ll need to replace overhead. When we discussed this last week they said only one half of the house needed to be cleared out, which we worked on all weekend long. OH MY LORD.
Ed had to be at work on time, so I was running around getting EVERYTHING into the garage…couch, sofa, chairs, boxes, lamps, books, decorations, framed art, tables, doggie stuff, laundry, YOU NAME IT. The contractors were nice enough to help me out with the big stuff, but it was still backbreaking, sweaty, dirty work.
I rolled in to work about 9:30 and collapsed in my chair, which somehow had broken over the weekend so I had to catch myself before falling. Apparently one of the chair back screws had come loose. Sweet!!!
This is how I feel right now and it’s not even noon!
Could it have been possible for us to have take an even bigger bite out of the proverbial apple of life?
16 comments:
Oh my goodness, you've had a full day and then some...wish there was a way to help you!
Wow. You have a full plate woman.
Getting married is no easy feat for any of us...but you really are getting the "run around"
Love the picture...hope it all works out for you.
Holy crap. I'm sooooo sorry. Why is it always EVERYTHING at once??? And the fact that your chair broke is just the icing on the shit cake of life. This is not a great way to start the week. I'm hoping there's other options for you guys with Italy but since you're dealing with government officials and regulations I know that's going to be challenging. Could you still have the ceremony there and just dot the i's when you're back here?
You guys are in my thoughts. Remember to just take it one day at a time which I know is so hard when you're sooo rushed with deadlines. Remember how you got through the stress with Achilles and how each day you saw improvement little by little. I pray that will happen for you again with all this.
We're both having shit splat days though hu?? Must be something in our beautiful sunny S. Cal air.
Dang, girl. I think I would've started to cry too (and I never cry).
I think I gotta second Laura's suggestion on this one.... go ahead and have a beautiful ceremony in Italy and then "make it legal" when you get back here.
(I can't stand bureaucrats.... they tend to be sniveling little bullies that do their jobs without regard for compassion OR commom sense...)
Hang tough. You and your Belov-ED WILL get married, come hell or high water!! And you'll look SMASHING and have a wonderful, beauty-filled wedding day! :-)
OH, my. Oh. Crap.
Deep breath.
Okay, you do not need advice, I know that. I have question, though: I know that the French have a civil ceremony first, and then a church one; is there any way to do something like that, one of them the easy way (without all of the world's-most-difficult-to-acquire docu*bleeping*ments) and then one in Rome? Just wondering. And sending you a HUGE hug.
Thank you Maggie, Suz, Laura, HWHL, and Karen! I've had a cup of coffee and a COOKIE (couldn't get Laura's angry kitty cookies off my brain), so I feel much better now!!!
If we do the civil thing here then our wedding date won't be 08-08-08. We want the civil certificate to reflect where we took our vows that day.
That is such a hugely important day for the two of us. It's been our celebratory day ever since we've been together and it seemed straight out of the movies that our wedding day could fall on that date. My b-day is 8/6 and Ed's is 8/10, and we've always partied and hung out together on 8/8. We've ven
I have a bunch of docs that I have complete and send out with a woe-is-me begging & pleading letter, so pray for us! Hopefully it will work and we'll get everything to Rome before 7/1. FINGERS CROSSED!
Whoops! I meant to complete that sentence. We've even taken the day of 8/8 off from work in the past if it fell on a weekday so we could just do a beach bar crawl together all day long. Soooo much fun!
Praying the Maria (from "The Sound of Music") prayer: "When the Lord closes a door, somewhere He opens a window!" and that His will (Love) be done.
We could all sign a "cut the crap and let these lovely people marry" petition to send along with your requests! Keep the faith, all will work according to plan, I know it!
KBL, come visit my blog this evening if you have a moment. I can all but guarantee the photo you'll see will make you smile, laugh out loud and make you feel better. :-)
I just put it on there 5 minutes ago. :-)
OMG I love Maggies's suggestion. And knowing all of us in this blog circle - we'd totally do it!
Prays and hope are coming your way.
Oh - and maybe even a batch of Angry Kitty cookies...
Oh My God! You know these bureaucrats are just petty little people who come up with new rules every other thursday just because they can. Hoping everything goes out smoothly and you get your proof of existence:) Good luck!!
Ah bureaucrats, how fun they make life. You fit an entire week of frustration into one morning. It's a wonder you haven't hurt anyone yet. Good Luck! I am sure the post office only added to your little mini hell.
I am hoping everything goes as it should. This has been a crap week for everyone (except Dudley) it seems. There has to be a light at the end of the tunnel, right???
I really hope you get things worked out! No matter what, it will be a beautiful day for you and your belov-ED :)
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